Where We Once Were

Sleep until the sun goes down. Wishing my days away. Keep on wishing my days away. And she said to me to wait. Wait, and pretty soon everything will become clear. That’s how it always works. If we hold off long enough, suddenly everything comes right. That or it all goes hideously wrong. But at least it’s always one of the two. There’s some great impetus for doing nothing. Yeah… I’d really rather not though. Fine. Don’t. and then she looked at me, hand on the side of her face, you know that look. Head slightly cocked to one side, like she’s resting her head in her hand, fingers lightly tapping her temple. And she looked at me like that for a long moment.

‘You know, everything happens twice. But only once for a reason.’ Everything’s a repeat of what we heard yesterday, only this time it doesn’t make any sense. Or maybe it’s the other way around. Maybe nothing ever makes sense the first time. It’s why we’re all consistently lost. Yeah, I thought I knew where I was going. I thought the map I had would get me there. I guess it’s outdated. How quickly things are outdated. I swear there used to be a street here. And on the corner, right there, just after the house with the green mailbox. Didn’t you grow up just around the corner? And we’d go down your backgarden and play in the creek bed. Following it all the way up to the park. Looking for old frisbees lost in the undergrowth. And when the rain finally came at the end of summer, we’d drag the raft upstream along the trail, and float back down through the rapids. It seemed so dangerous and exciting then! Setting out for adventure in our little stream. I went back there not long ago. I could hop across it almost all the way up. What happened to our rapids? To that vast and powerful river? How do things change so much? At least it feels like they changed. But I could have sworn it was this way… and then memory fails and we go plummeting into some unknown depths. Ever been here before? Only yesterday. If you get lost I’m not coming to find you. I don’t know the way.

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